What to do when you can't pay your debts
If you can't cover your payments this month, you're not alone and you're not out of options. Millions of people fall behind every year — after a job loss, an illness, a relationship breakdown, or simply months of prices rising faster than pay. There are well-established routes through this, and people take them every day.
The first step isn't dramatic. It's opening the letters you've been avoiding, or writing a simple list of who you owe and roughly how much. That's it. Avoidance feels protective, but it's the expensive option: interest and charges keep building, missed-payment fees stack up, and creditors escalate when they hear nothing. Problems with debt compound quietly — and almost every route out starts with knowing what you're dealing with.
One thing to say up front: this article is education, not regulated debt or legal advice. The rules around debt differ from country to country, and your situation is specific to you. What follows is the general shape of what works almost everywhere — and where to find free, qualified help for the details.
Step 1: Get the full picture on paper
Before any decisions, gather three things:
- What you owe. Every debt: who it's with, the balance (an estimate is fine to start), the monthly payment, and whether you're behind.
- What comes in. Wages, benefits, support payments — your realistic monthly income.
- What must go out. Housing, energy, food, transport, essentials for your family.
This takes an evening, and it changes everything. It tells you whether this is a temporary squeeze or a deeper shortfall, and it's exactly the information a debt adviser or a creditor's hardship team will ask for. You'll walk into those conversations prepared instead of guessing.
Step 2: Protect the debts that matter most
When money is short, it's tempting to pay whoever shouts loudest — usually the credit card company that calls three times a day. Resist that. Debts aren't equal. Some carry consequences far beyond a mark on your credit file, and those are the ones to protect first, even if their collectors are the quietest. Debt charities call these priority debts, and both Citizens Advice and MoneyHelper publish detailed guidance on working out which is which.
| Priority debts | Why they come first |
|---|---|
| Rent or mortgage | Falling behind can ultimately mean losing your home. |
| Energy and essential utilities | Arrears can lead to disconnection or forced prepayment. |
| Government debts — local or national taxes, court fines | These often carry stronger enforcement powers than ordinary lenders, such as deductions from wages or action by enforcement agents. |
| Car finance, if you need the car for work | Losing the vehicle can mean losing the income you need to fix everything else. |
| Child support | Non-payment can trigger serious legal consequences in many countries. |
Credit cards, personal loans, overdrafts, buy-now-pay-later and store cards are usually non-priority debts. Missing them damages your credit score and brings collection letters — unpleasant, but survivable and fixable. Missing a priority debt can cost you your home, your heating or your transport. The exact rules and names differ by country, but the principle holds everywhere: keep a roof over your head, the lights on, and your way to work — then deal with the rest.
Step 3: Talk to your creditors before they chase you
This is the step people dread most, and the one that most often surprises them. Almost every sizeable lender has a hardship or financial-difficulty process, because people falling behind is a normal part of their business. Depending on the lender and your situation, they may be able to freeze or reduce interest, accept lower payments for a while, agree a short payment holiday, or stop collection activity while you get advice.
You don't need a script — you need honesty and your figures from step 1. Say that you're in financial difficulty, give a truthful picture of your income and essential outgoings, and say what you can realistically afford, even if that's very little or nothing right now. Don't promise payments you can't keep; a small amount paid reliably is worth more than a big promise that fails.
Keep a record of every contact: the date, who you spoke to, and what was agreed. Follow up phone calls with a short email or message so there's a written trail. Creditors deal far more flexibly with someone who engages early than with silence — proactive almost always beats avoidant.
Step 4: Get free debt advice — this is the big one
If your budget shows you can't cover your essentials and your debt payments, don't try to negotiate your way through alone. In most countries there are non-profit or government-backed debt advice services, and they are genuinely free, confidential and non-judgemental. In the UK that includes StepChange, National Debtline and Citizens Advice; in the US, non-profit credit counselling agencies accredited through the NFCC, with the CFPB as a consumer watchdog. Our resources page lists free services by country.
A good adviser can do things no calculator or article can:
- Build an income-and-expenditure statement in the format creditors accept, and negotiate with them on your behalf.
- Check whether debts are correctly owed and still enforceable — sometimes they aren't.
- Spot benefits, grants or charitable support you're entitled to but not claiming.
- Explain the formal debt solutions available where you live, and set them up if one fits.
These services have seen every situation, including far worse than yours. There is nothing you can tell them that will shock them, and asking for help early gives you more options, not fewer.
Be careful who "helps" you
Where there are people in debt, there are businesses selling rescue. Some are regulated and legitimate; plenty are not worth your money. Watch for:
- Fee-charging debt management firms selling the same plans that charities arrange for free — the fee comes out of money that could be repaying your debts.
- "Write off your debt" advertising that pushes everyone towards one product regardless of whether it fits, because that's what pays the commission.
- Consolidation offers secured on your home. Turning unsecured debt into debt secured against your house raises the stakes enormously — our guide to debt consolidation loans explains when consolidation helps and when it quietly makes things worse.
A simple rule of thumb: if they contacted you first, or the fee comes before the help, walk away. Free, reputable advice services don't cold-call and don't charge.
Formal options exist — an adviser will know which fits
If reduced payments and negotiation aren't enough, most countries have formal routes: structured repayment arrangements, schemes that freeze interest or write off part of what's owed, and insolvency procedures as a genuine last resort. The names, eligibility rules and long-term consequences vary a great deal by country — which is exactly why a free adviser matters. Choosing the wrong one, or the right one at the wrong time, can be costly, so this is a decision to make with qualified, impartial help rather than from an advert.
Your credit score is not the priority right now
A common reason people avoid asking for help is fear of what it will do to their credit file. Be honest with yourself: if you're missing payments, your file is already recording it. Credit scores recover — arrangements and defaults age off your record over a period of years, and rebuilding is a well-trodden path. A lost home, a disconnected supply or an escalating court debt is far harder to undo. Protect your essentials and your health first; your score can be repaired later.
Look after yourself, not just the numbers
Debt problems and poor mental health feed each other — money worries disturb sleep, and stress makes it harder to open envelopes and make calls. If debt is affecting your mental health, say so when you speak to an adviser or a creditor: many services have specialist teams, and some creditors will pause collection activity while you get support. And talk to someone — a partner, a friend, a doctor. Debt thrives on secrecy, and it loses most of its power the moment it's shared.
When you're back on your feet
There's a point where the crisis passes: payments are agreed, essentials are covered, and there's something left over each month. That's when planning your way out of debt becomes useful. Our guide on how to make a debt payoff plan walks through it step by step, our tips for finding extra money to put towards debt can speed things up, and the free payoff planner will show you your debt-free date and how much interest you'll save.
To be clear about the order of things: the planner is for when your payments are affordable. If they're not — if the budget doesn't balance no matter how you arrange it — free advice comes first, every time. Get the foundations steady, then plan the climb. There are more guides here when you're ready.
Sources and further reading
The explanations in this guide are based on published guidance from regulators, government-backed money services and established references:
- Priority debts: which debts to pay first — StepChange Debt Charity (UK)
- Work out which debts to deal with first — Citizens Advice (UK)
- How to prioritise your debts — MoneyHelper (UK, government-backed)
- What is a debt relief program and how do I know if I should use one? — Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (US)